It’s somewhat redundant to say that Dr. Connie Osterholt is inspiring; after all, she is a motivational speaker and life coach. However, when you consider that when she was forty-one-year’s old she started this new career and chapter of her life…the interest level raises. Then contemplate that she stepped forward at her first speaking engagement (when the scheduled speaker cancelled the day before) and addressed 7,000 people at a seminar in Frankfurt…and didn’t crumble into a sobbing heap in the corner as most of us would but rather received numerous accolades…the interest continues to swell. Finally, the fact that Dr. Osterholt has become a well-known and respected author and speaker travelling to all parts of the world with the purpose of aiding others to possess the same self-fulfilling relationship and career success she has attained, the word inspiration becomes highly appropriate.
Born in Schiedam (the Netherlands), a mid-sized town under the smoke of Rotterdam and the biggest harbor city in the world, Connie grew up in the picturesque surrounding of lovely canals, 17th century warehouses, bridges, and mansions. Self-described as stubborn, responsible, and a bit odd; it seemed that she was destined to pursue a less conventional career and life path. Her love of sports and psychology/sociology/philosophy hinted at her discipline and drive to be involved with others and their goals/needs. She studied NLP and went to Tony Robbins’ seminars where she found the combination of Psychology and Physiology [ motion creates emotion, change your feelings through moving] particularly fascinating. The previously mentioned fortuitous situation in Frankfurt presented Dr. Osterholt with the opportunity of a lifetime…or rather the opportunity to redirect her lifetime. She reveals, “Being a speaker came easy to me. I never had a fear of public speaking. I had some challenges when I started speaking in English, my second language, and I was very conscious of my accent. Then I focused on the fact that words are only 7% of communication, tone of voice 38%, and 55 % is body language. Everyone has an accent; once you accept that and get beyond it to the real message things get much easier. It’s important to walk your talk, listen, have a great understanding and compassion for the people in front of you. Be solution oriented, have masses of energy, know your tools, prepare, prepare, and prepare again. No matter who you are or what walk of life you are in, focus on the people with you and how you can best serve them. It works the same for me as for anyone else.”
Beyond her motivational speaking at mass seminars and the individuals she works with one on one, Dr. Osterholt has become a noted and respect author. Her books incorporate her positive perspective on self-empowerment as well as her views on achieving success in relationships, both with one’s self and with others. “Superfood for Thought” was compiled over a period of years as Connie wrote weekly lessons that were reminders of how to go through life, taking care of your loved ones while avoiding the self-imposed need to become a super woman. The book directs the reader to take time to enjoy the little rewards of life and in so doing, to enhance one’s mood, feelings, and overall well-being.
Her book “Finding Your Love Forever” is a simple step by step process, a recipe if you will, for getting love. It’s a combination of addressing your mindset, becoming the best partner, man, wife, etc. that you can be and take the appropriate action to attract the one for you. Simple, easy, and effective steps…which can too often be overlooked. People do not know what to do to attract love and make it sustainable, some are lucky, some are not. Some give up, some keep on making the same mistakes. “Finding Your Love Forever” provides a way to change your mind and an approach to reach your heart and that of others. Dr. Osterholt professes, “You have to make room for romance when you want it. Do not get jaded or take love or your partner for granted. Create romantic moments; if you do not know how to do this, ask your partner what he or she wants. Play to the differences in masculine and feminine energies. I think we were confused when society stated that all we wanted was equality of the sexes. Equality in jobs, careers, pay, opportunities, possibilities, yes…but when you keep the differences in your energies it makes life so much more pleasurable. The most beautiful compliment I ever got was when I came offstage and a man said, ‘You are a beautiful speaker. Yes, there are a lot of great speakers, but your feminine energy brings something extra to the stage. You allow us men to bring out our masculine energy and we love it.’ Most importantly, experience romance the way you and your partner want to; it’s not cookie cutter. Make it your own. In the past, it might have been more culturally determined but we have the freedom to make our romance fit us in today’s society.”
As proof of both Dr. Osterholt’s worldwide acclaim and the fact that her ideas and teachings cross all cultural and social strata, she has become a renowned speaker and expert in Japan…in spite of the fact that she only speaks five words of the language! Japanese speaker and author Takemi Omori witnessed Connie’s talent for communication first hand. Osterholt explains, “Takemi had seen me at multiple Tony Robbins events: speaking, leading, and coaching teams. For three years I had the Japanese teams as my responsibility, making sure that they understood everything and were able to implement/integrate their learning. In the mornings of the seminar (a 6-day event, called “Date with Destiny”) I prepared them for the day to come and answered questions, helping them change their emotions and focus if needed. I worked with a translator as I only speak five words of Japanese. We worked well together. The universal body language, expressions, gestures, being respectful, and interest in people is the same everywhere. As a people, the Japanese are very polite, respectful, and eager to learn new things. Takemi was in my group. He speaks some English and was seen as the leader of his group. We connected well and I became his platinum coach for three-plus years. He loves the way I can make him see outside of the box, hold him responsible, and challenge him to step up. He did some research on me, found my books, and was particularly interested in my ‘Forever Love’ book (it’s now translated in Japanese as well). He invited me to come speak in japan in January and July of 2015.”
Because this type of introspection and motivation is such a new concept in Japan, Dr. Osterholt approached it only after performing her own due diligence in studying the culture and personal relationships. She relents that while the goals for men and women are often the same regardless of their culture, the methods in which they are pursued can vary greatly. She reveals, “It’s vital to understand a culture, their mindset, and their thoughts in order to find the way to best assist them on their journey. It’s not only to be respectful but also to understand where they are coming from. When the audience feels that you understand and respect them, they are inclined to listen more intently. You have a starting point in which you make your content totally relevant to their situation. This is especially important when you are a foreigner. Before I spoke to the crowds in Japan, I asked the producer of the event and Takemi a lot of questions about the Japanese people, their culture, and how they view relationships. Luckily, I had interacted for over four years at that point with groups of Japanese individuals who had come to Tony Robbins events in which I was their trainer/leader. I also researched statistics to get an overview. What I found is that a lot of Japanese live in big cities an have a tendency to be depressed because their main focus is on how to earn money to afford a small house. There is not much time for them to spend in the relationship area. They might want one but do not know how to combine work, a relationship, and a family.”
The message that Dr. Osterholt speaks most loudly, whether in her actual voice or her literary one, is to be honest and forthright with yourself and others. Don’t deny your own potential or happiness and extend that right to others in your life. Your mate, your children, and yes…yourself deserves the absolute best. It may be tiring, it may be challenging, but when you look back on your life the accomplishment of truly loving yourself and those most important to you is unequaled. Dr. Connie Osterholt pushed the restart button on her own life at age forty-one and claimed the life for herself which she had always desired and in doing so helped countless others around the planet achieve the same.